George Carlin

George Carlin, died Sunday at the age of 71. He leaves behind a series of memorable routines and jokes.

Carlin, who had a history of heart trouble, went into St. John's Health Center in Santa Monica on Sunday afternoon complaining of chest pain and died of heart failure later that evening.

Some of George's work:

When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?

When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

Women like silent men, they think they're listening.

Why is the man (or woman) who invests all your money called a broker?

The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

-- Thanks for all the laughs, George --