The Orange Coneheads

As of January 14, 2008 at 7:22 PM
Steps: 782,145
Miles: 333.00

As you may recall, we last saw Delores and Harold trying to get to Cleveland and missing the train at 30th Street Station, Philadelphia PA.

The sight of them standing on the platform, triggered a song in my head:

Just a small town girl living in a lonely world
She took the midnight train going anywhere...
Just a city boy born and raised in South Detroit
He took the midnight train going anywhere*...

...or nowhere as the case may be.

* - Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey

Knowing there was far more to their story then meets the eye, I, the Real World Walker investigated things, you know me... always asking questions. And now without further ado:


Here's the story of a conehead lady
Who was bringing up two very lovely girls.
Both of them had no hair t'all, just like their mother,
The youngest one wore pearls.


Here's the story, of a man named Harold,
Who was busy with a boy of his own,
They were two men, living all together,
Yet they were all alone.

Till the one day when the lady met this fellow
And they knew it was much more than a hunch,
That this group would somehow form a family...

...okay, surely you get the drift by now.

So, Delores, Samantha, and youngest, Heather, met up with Harold and Jayden.


Samantha is quite lovely. She won the Miss Perky Orange beauty pageant in 2006 and again in 2007. As you can see, she has a perfect form and her well-formed base has broken the hearts of many a young boy Conehead.


Heather is quite young yet, and still carries her little dolly around with her, even while turning a jump rope.


Harold makes a living as a contractor. Hard at work, we see him with his favorite back-hoe and front-end loader. Harold really enjoys having his family come and visit while he works. If you look closely, you will see the children safely on the curb proudly watching their dad.


The Coneheads enjoy the outdoors. Here we see Mr. and Mrs. Conehead (lower right) at the family's camping cabin down by the Perkiomen Creek.


In addition to traveling to Cleveland (yes, they finally made it, more on that story some other time), they went and toured the local Nuclear power plant. They got a real charge out of that.


Samantha (or perhaps it was Heather, I find them very hard to tell them apart) went to Yellowstone to see Old Faithful with her schoolmates.


Here the entire family is out walking in Hawaii. They walk so fast they've gotten way ahead of me.


Before Delores met Harold, she worked as singer for a small band. Very few people know the she was the real singer of the song that goes:

My baby takes the morning train
He works from nine till five and then
He takes another home again
To find me waitin' for him

Of course, Sheena Easton would disagree.


Not everything comes up roses for the Coneheads. Here you see some of them in the ER waiting room... why?


...because Jayden overdosed one day sniffing automobile exhaust. Seriously ill, you can see has lost his reflective stripe.


Here the EMTs work feverishly trying to save Jayden's life while Harold looks on worried out of his mind.


Jayden, however, was alright. After a brief stay at the hospital, he was released. The entire neighborhood came out to celebrate, because as you and I well know, there is nothing an Orange Conehead enjoys more than a parade!

My lawyer tells me I need to say, "No Orange Coneheads were harmed making this blog."